Online Marketing and E-Mail

What to do when you have annoyed?

Not too long ago, actually it was last week, I had this embarrassing situation happen to me.  I know I might have offended someone and I hope I haven’t offended more than that.  I think I first will have to explain what is going on.

The Situation:

I regularly receive e-mails from people who just happen to get my information from some online/offline source.  And because I take what they are sending, not as an intrusion, only as another potential “Partner/Sale” into my primary opportunity.

You see; I know I haven’t signed up for anything, opted in to this program or that program – I just don’t do it.  I just don’t have the time and wherewithall for such.   I do opt in to webinars and conference calls from sources I already have a relationship with from time to time, like the INC. 500’s Blog (Online Marketing –, which brings me to why I am posting this situation of mine.   Because many people send me e-mails looking for me to do this or that I just add their e-mail into a list and at some future date I will send them information about a product/service I have.  I figure if they are networkers and like me having a shortage of leads, I might as well connect with them in the same manner they have already instituted.  At least I can feel like they started it.    Now I call myself categorizing the people I have added very carefully and I have now come to find out my “fact” checking needs some “CHECKING”.  One person I didn’t intend to send anything to received some unsolicited items from me and I was still embarrassed.  I replied explaining my oversight and immediately removed them from that list/category they were erroneously were placed in.  The people I intended the e-mail to seem would really benefit from a program/tool I have had the fortune of being introduced to.  As I embark on the path of Attraction Marketing and just getting into not always hunting as opposed to being the hunted, I still don’t shy away from the occasion to send some of what I do to people who are sending me what it is they do.  One good turn deserves another is pretty much what it boils down to.  There is no sense in wasting a “perfectly” good e-mail that just pops into your lap.  I was told that “Spam” ain’t always to be deleted.  I took all of that to heart and will from time to time send good information to bad senders.  Nothing ventured nothing gained.

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  1. May 1, 2011 at 5:12 am

    Hi Charles,
    I guess it is a good practice to find out who is spamming you, but I don’t do it.
    A lot of the spammers are spamming from some other email address that is not their primary email. Now what has happened is that some outfit has hijacked my primary email and using it from some other server to spam tons of people. I wish there were a way to put a stop to that kind of practice, but I do not know what it is. So if anyone reading this knows the answer, please advise!
    Thank you,

    • May 14, 2011 at 12:36 am

      Hello Linda,

      That is a topic I am going to pursue: How to keep your list from being stolen. It’s sad that our information isn’t all that safe. There is a reason why some sites want us to “Upload” our contact lists.

      Be afraid, Be Very Afraid,


  2. May 5, 2011 at 8:55 pm

    Charles, The same thing has happened to me. I get so many emails, I can’t keep up. So I did categorize them and had MANY oversights. Oooops! It did get uncomfortable for me because then people would call me and ask if I ever received their email.
    I know the feeling quite well. So now I take time every day to carefully check them. I’m still behind, but I’m catching up.
    Donna Merrill

    • May 14, 2011 at 12:12 am

      Thanks Donna,

      I really needed to know I am not the only one that this has happened to. (LOL) I am online to build relationships and not destroy them. Understanding people can only be so understanding. So i have to do as you do and take the time to “carefully” check my work.

      Thanks for reading,


  3. May 7, 2011 at 11:48 am

    Hey Charles,

    Reply marketing is very effective when done correctly. I can relate that you must get 100’s of emails from other marketers who send you their opportunities or services. Many of these marketers will get your email from traffic exchanges, safe lists, list builders, etc.

    I do not want to add these people to any sort of list. The people on my list come from direct response to one of my ads from various sources online.

    What I do is when I see these ads in my email I simply hit reply and thank them for their offer and then I return with an offer of personal assistance to help them in their online business.

    I usually spend no more then 15 minutes a day with Reply Marketing.

    Thanks for sharing your experience Charles,


    • May 14, 2011 at 12:09 am

      Hello Kevin,

      Email marketing firms like AWEBER, iCONTACT and others send out stuff on “Behalf” of such and such and those aren’t the ones I place in que. It’s smaller marketers like myself that could probably use information I have in their endeavors. If the mail doesn’t come back then I have a list started. I do give them a chance to “opt out”, tho.

      And thanks for reading,


  4. May 10, 2011 at 8:06 am

    Hello Charles, good point. No reason not to send your information or offer back to people who send theirs. It will be a pretty low return response rate, for sure, as people who send out such emails are often doing it in bulk and probably don’t read most replies, but there are a few who do. You never know what will resonate with them.

    • May 14, 2011 at 12:03 am

      Hey Eldon,

      I figured as much. I don’t read all of that mess that ends up in my spam folder, but sometimes I make exceptions and travel through the “muck and mire” and guess what I do find some gems that shouldn’t really be there.

      Thanks for the comment


  5. May 10, 2011 at 6:44 pm

    Hi Charles,

    I have some questions for you. If I sent you an email with my product and opportunity embedded in it, how far would that get me? Hmmm. Not too far, would it? Why? Because you are not a prospect. And, when you send me back an email with your product and opportunity embedded in it, how far with that get you? Again, not too far. Why? Because I am not a prospect either. Hmmm.

    It’s kind of like being married. If you knew I was married, would you try and pick me up or ask me if I wanted to date your sister? Probably not a wise idea, if you want to be a friend of mine, right? So, let’s consider that in terms of this email exchange. If you are “married” why in the world would I be foolish enough to try and get you to commit adultery?

    So, why don’t we quit wasting our time creating email pitches and cross-SPAMMING each other, and just decide to find better ways to connect with each other and learn how we REALLY can help each other, without having a ‘pitchfest’ via email?

    It had to be said.


    David H. Paul
    the Follow Your Bliss guy

    • May 14, 2011 at 12:00 am

      Hello Paul,

      And thanks for saying what had to be said. Trying to Woo them that are not “LoveLorn” is an exercise in futility. So an avenue that gets us both to just explore what it is we do is always welcomed. Especially to an open-minded sort like me. I am sure many who do try and send items of that sort never really get approved and or read in its entirety. So it’s always better to build from nothing and allow time to make a way.

      Thanks for the comment.


  6. May 26, 2011 at 4:27 pm

    Hey Charles, yeah Spam can be quite annoying and as Linda mentioned they come from unmonitored email addresses… Did you ever got the same email from 100’s of different yahoo – email addresses, so that you can’t blacklist these email address? This is so annoying… Honestly I wouldn’t give a minute to reply to such emails, which at the end will just land up in the deleted folder…. Thx, Alex

    • May 29, 2011 at 9:13 pm

      Hello Alexander,
      When I feel like sending out something to them, what I try to do is sort out names that look like someone is on the other end. I know it’s hard to do and I might get a few but It’s a shot in the dark and I might hit something one day.



  7. May 28, 2011 at 7:43 pm

    Well said Charles. I understand what you are trying to convey. We all would like quality information but just don’t expect it in our junk or spam mail. In fact sometimes a spam mail turns into an opportunity. I have the privilege of knowing a person who found a job, just by following the link in the mail to a job listing website.

    • May 29, 2011 at 9:20 pm

      Thanks for stopping by Hazel, opportunity is exactly what I am seeking when I send something out to them. I don’t expect anything, but who knows. Some of the people who have sent me stuff have used the “CC” and I have access to additional people without looking for them. So I might as well check what is being sent and I do just that get them the information.

      Thanks again,


  8. June 1, 2011 at 11:25 am

    Hey Charles,
    It’s funny how annoyed we get from these intrusions into our email boxes. Some days it takes all my new southern belle skills to keep my inner Jersey Girl from replying with some sassy language. The most frustrating mails are those that do not include the required ‘unsubscribe’ language. Aargh! But I know enough about the strength of email marketing to know that I will probably always have to deal with more spam than I would like in order to keep using the valuable tool. And I am more careful with my outbound messages because I’m sensitive to the types of messages I hate to receive. I hope you had an awesome holiday! Allegra

    • June 18, 2011 at 10:33 am

      Thank you Allegra. Even when you use that “unsubscribe” button, you in effect are validating your own address. They are really fishing for monitored email addresses and I tend not to allow those to get any further than my Spam Folder.

  9. June 12, 2011 at 9:48 am

    Charles, email management is a very important subject for business. I know many business who use a separate email for marketing rather than getting everything together and missing some gold nugget we want to read. I agree it is very important to send quality information that people will appreciate and build your business this way. Instead of just annoying people with low quality emails etc. Many thanks for this post take care Rosemary

    • June 18, 2011 at 10:41 am

      Hello Rosemary,
      All Emails, ain’t Bad mails. I also use separate emails for different purposes. I don’t want to give everyone the same address either.

  10. June 15, 2011 at 11:07 pm

    For me it seems to work better to just delete the spammers. I would rather send fewer emails out to people who have opted in to my lists. Even then, i get some people who consider it spam – and I don’t send a lots of emails to my lists.


    • June 18, 2011 at 10:45 am

      Hello Dr. Goodstone,
      I will delete in wholesale many of the spammers email and look handle the ones I feel are people like myself looking for value and contact them with “counter” offers. I agree with you and personally believe that sending “lots of emails” is going to be counter-productive to my cause.


  11. June 16, 2011 at 3:00 am

    Hey Charles,

    I know how this feels… sometimes it happens to me but oh well! 😀

    You can’t let the small stuff get ya down, even when it’s a tad bit embarrassing.

    Always keep plugging away.


    • June 18, 2011 at 10:47 am

      Hello Dereck,

      I will take that suggestion and “Always keep plugging …” at this thing called …..

  12. June 21, 2011 at 3:48 pm

    Hi Charles,
    I really like your style, authenticity, and honesty. Your words are what many marketers can relate. I think we’ve all made the mistake of spamming without realizing it and you are right when you say it is embarrassing. In my opinion, the best thing to do is to directly contact the person and present your case that the unsolicited email was not intended for them. Sometimes a benefit for this kind of honesty will surface!

    If you are a firm believer in attraction marketing, which I am, then it is perfectly fine to occasionally reach out to other marketers, as long as you have developed a relationship and you know them enough if something will service.

    Thanks, Charles.
    Raena Lynn

    • June 22, 2011 at 3:28 pm

      Hello Raena,

      I had to do just that – let that person know they weren’t supposed to receive that info. I value privacy and wouldn’t want someone I just gave my e-mail to, to just start sending me stuff I didn’t ask for. When speak to someone that doesn’t want my service or product I don’t want to literally throw that contact information in the trash, nor do I want to erase them from my database (unless asked to). I simply ask them if it’s OK to keep in contact “from time to time”. When I do that the answer is usually “Yes”.

      It’s really about building relationships.


  13. August 25, 2011 at 12:47 pm

    Hi Charles,

    I understand you doing that because when I started out I did that too. I did it similarly to Kevin and would reply back and offer help or inquire about their offer or suggest how we could help each other. I don’t do it very often now though because the response was too low. And I found that even in the people that did respond, they weren’t interested in forming any partnerships, they usually just wanted me to do their offer without any reciprocity. Very occasionally now I’ll respond by saying hi and trying to form a connection without trying to accomplish anything except for networking. If that works, then we have a basis to help each other in the future. Now, In general the only people that get added to a list are the people who have initiated contact by joining the list. I find that accusations of spam and frustrating interactions go way down this way. Take care and thanks for sharing your experience- Rob

  14. September 1, 2011 at 4:54 pm

    Hey Charles,

    This is certainly a great debate. I often look at spammers and those annoying messages we now seem to get on Facebook too as potential clients, customers and prospects but I have to say I hardly ever reply to them.

    I think it would be hard to get a positive response form any of them, but who knows, would love to know how you have been getting on with that. and if you have had any results.

    Thanks for a great read and a great debate in your comments, I enjoyed it.

    Beth 🙂

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